It’s been almost two months since my last post. This seems to happen frequently. This time, at least, it’s for a semi-decent reason. As a member of our Pancake community, there are a lot of things in the house that I don’t tend to tell you all about. Sometimes it’s because of laziness, sometimes it’s because of privacy issues, and sometimes it’s because I simply can’t wrap my head around what’s just happened. And as much as I want to update you with the every day happenings of community life, sometimes it’s just not my place to share. So I will try my best to catch you up, but I will try even harder to focus on the future and where we feel God is leading us. I need to keep reminding myself to focus on the positive.
Before the holidays, there were a lot of issues in our community that started to manifest themselves. We all met together, and it was expressed that some people felt God pulling in one direction, while others felt pulled in an opposite one. After Christmas, I arrived back at the house with Michael, helped move boxes, and rearranged our house. Our community became half of it’s original size, which meant things looked a little different. But, it’s all for the best. God is still working.
We had a wonderful party to welcome the new year, with friends from all over the city. It’s funny to think that they were all complete strangers only three months ago. Lucky for us, it’s pretty easy to get connected in Harrisburg, if you just try. This city has so much love and creativity, and I can’t wait to see what this year brings. While the year is new, there’s already lots of changes taking place. One of the most exciting for me, is that one of the members of our larger community approached us about living in the house. I won’t tell you who it is (in the interest of privacy), but I took lots of pictures!
First of all, I was super excited because I finally had an excuse to make scones! I made these gingerbread scones with dried cranberries and rolled oats, and I felt pretty satisfied with them. They were certainly sconey. I definitely prefer biscuits (it seems I am American after all), but there’s nothing that’s quite as fun as setting a scone on a little tea saucer and spreading butter on it. I need to invite people to tea more often.
Before tea yesterday, we had several conversations leading up to it, most with the whole house present. She’s asked a lot of questions, all of them thought out and honest. We’ve tried to provide honest answers, and ask questions in return. I said yesterday that talking about our daily life in this context makes it seem so strange… “Yes, we have breakfast every Saturday morning, to build a larger community and get to better know each other.” Weird. While everything we do is intentional, it isn’t without a lot of love and earnest desire to make things better for humanity. So it seems strange to categorize or define our daily events and interactions. It makes it seem contrived to me, or even fake. But it would be fake to say we do all things without intent. Every commandment we follow has a “what,” as well as a “why.”
(Freely you have recieved), freely give. Matthew 10:8
Love one another (as I have loved you). John 13:34
Be merciful, (just as your Father is merciful). Luke 6:36
Everything we do, or try to do, we do because it’s what God does. We are trying and failing every day, but it’s our ultimate hope that we can at least provide a small glimpse of God through our lives. So, here we are. We are broken, we are fumbling through, trying to carry on with this idea that God gave us, and trying to always include others in that vision. At it’s heart, it’s beautiful. And we can’t give up no matter how much it hurts, or feels pointless at times.